Seems like just yesterday

I'm amazed that some things seem like they both
were just yesterday and
also seem to be ages ago.
Time is not so fixed and concrete
as it seems that it should be.
the last 16 years
in a heartbeat.

Soaking in Some Sun

Important to stop and notice
that the sun is shining
and it warms up our bones
our ideas
our dreams.
Winter doesn't last forever.
And I notice that the sun feels warmer
when it is cold outside.

Please, be mine.

Oh, dear life,
Please be my valentine.
Let's kiss and make up.
Enough of this sadness and fighting.
Instead we can have big, sweet, sticky
times together again.
(With powdered sugar)

It's All Relative

There are tough jobs
and trying days
and stress.
But then there is what this guy
has to deal with everyday.
Important to
keep perspective.

Wishing it were so...

Wishing that all the parts
of my work
could be as fun as planning
cool stuff with
other people.

Simplest

What I need now are the cleanest
most simple solutions.
With little drama, and even less
complication.
Just like a cold clear
winter day.

Plans and Lists and more Plans

Lists and plans
going in many directions
planning and fixing and doing and changing
and mostly
working and hoping.
New direction needed.

Exercising Demons

My Demons. 
The repeat factor of dealing with the same stresses
over and over again.
The same things I am not good at.
Keep coming back to bite me in the butt.
Time to break the chain.
grrrrr

Perspectiv-ity

It is all a matter of
hurly burly swirly vertigo-inspiring
perspective.
Walking a tightrope wire of
choices and ideas.
What comes first?
What comes last? 
And where do all the in between roads go?

Roughness

January was a month of rough
and craggy edges. Bumps and ugly wounds
But learning - Oh! the learning.

Eliot and Coffee Spoons

More ways to mark time
"Afternoons will be measured out
Measured out, measured with
Coffeespoons and T.S. Eliot"
fitfully and in stops and starts
this four weeks has been
so long. 

Little Things

On Mondays, (especially.)
I am grateful for tea.
An almost endless supply
of comfort and energy.

Winding and Climbing

Sometimes the upward climb seems endless and
the destination becomes obscured in the effort.
I am waiting for my second (third, fourth, fifth) wind.
Trying to find my inner reserve to keep climbing.
And hope it makes sense somewhere up there.

Marking Time

There are lots of ways to mark time
going in circles.
swinging back and forth.
Counting days and hours, or just letting them slide past.
It seems forever and just seconds ago all at the same time.
This has been a long four weeks.
And yet the time is getting away from me.

Temptation

As tempting as it is.
when I bury my head- the drama
sadly does not disappear.
So I have to keep picking up
and keep carrying on
and keep it all going.

The muddy, messy way forward

 It's all pretty muddy right now.
But there are little spots of clarity and reflection here and there.
And the path, though messy becomes more clear.
Now we need to try to take steps
without getting stuck. 

what to do...

A good thing to do when you are brain tired and heart weary
is sleep it off. After some junk food and indulgent entertainment.
Then pick up and start again tomorrow.

Age Old Sayings

It's pretty dark, just before dawn,
so I can see where the adage comes from.
Darkest just before it gets light... and all that.
Still it doesn't make the darker times feel any better.
The Darkness is temporary- but that doesn't make
it easier to see.
2013 is stretching out before me.
In a big messy pile of uncertainty.

Great Expecations Notwithstanding

Feeling discouraged
life is not behaving properly
and mostly everything is not working out
the way I thought it would.
nuf, said
Hopefully things will make sense soon.

As the year ends.

the christmas rush is in the past.
We are home for the quiet of a big city largely empty.
New years in Japan is a cleaning out, thoughtful, peaceful holiday.
A time to pause and consider.
There is much considering to do.
There is also much tea drinking, and doggie snuggling, and loitering and
lazing around to do. While I think about the future.